If the motto of the United States is "In God we trust", the motto of Australia should be "No worries". We northern hemisphere folk who, unlike our antipodean friends, have summer in the summer and winter in the winter believe that, come Christmas, an Aussie's problems boil down to finding room for another shrimp on the barbie while his guests…
Pole position
Several years ago we went on a family trip to Holland. Sitting in the front passenger seat of the taxi taking us south from Schiphol, I tried to keep the driver's attention while the kids re-enacted the Second World War in the rear of the van. Observing that signs on the motorway to Uit appeared over…
Composing tax laws
Returning to the gym last weekend after a fortnight, literally, off the treadmill, my rendition of "I'm back" in a passable Austro-Californian accent failed to register any reaction on the face of the young lady manning the reception desk. Instead, she merely ordered me to furnish my annual medical certificate that covers them if I suddenly keel over pulseless on…
One small step for Mitt
Neil Armstrong, who died last week, was one of my childhood heroes. It was not that I aspired to be an astronaut - I was a sedentary kid for whom "space" was what separated the sofa from the TV set - but I knew how to recognize greatness when I saw it. There were plenty of…
Of mice and men
When challenged by an aide as to why he had changed his mind about invading the tiny island nation of Grenada, Ronald Reagan is reported to have replied "I sat back and thought: What would John Wayne have done?" That was nearly 30 years ago and the protracted 7 week campaign was a huge military success for…
House warning
The expression "Moving House" is the sort of English up with which Winston Churchill would, famously, not have put. In point of fact, moving a house is exceptionally difficult and, other than in natural disasters, very rare. Believe me - I know. Every weekday evening for a year and a half I used to speed out of the office car park…
Risks of the import/export/import business
Back in the sixties when my all-time superhero, Batman, used to dress like he was going to a neighbourhood Halloween party, actors Adam West and Burt Ward would issue warnings to stupid children not to try any of their stunts at home. That was sound advice. While they had the full attention of the little weirdos…
World without borders
Blitzing Mannheim last Tuesday in advance of a meeting the following morning, I soon tired of the centre of town with its Water Tower, Paradeplatz and street names like P3 and Q5. Settling into my hotel room, I turned on the TV. Confronted by Mary Poppins dubbed into German - at least in British war movies they made the Germans speak…
Art for art’s sake
Brussels sprouts are the ultimate passion food. You either love them or hate them. I last gobbled one down 41 years, 2 months 3 weeks and 1 day ago. Condemned to a childhood of Friday night dinners with the accursed things, I eventually developed a technique of swallowing them whole. Since my marriage raw sprouts have…
French toast
The French are the masters of indignation. Staring at an offender from the top of his Gallic aquiline nose, a Frenchman can turn any opponent to blancmange faster than a speeding escargot. You don't cross the French. Marking Bastille Day last weekend with a cafe-au-lait and croissant in the comfort of my salon, my mind wandered back to…
Tax Break 